xp_deadpool | (no subject)

(no subject)

Guys, seriously. Logan and I ran around in the woods for like hours and the footprints are huge and I found a shoe. It's like, this slipper. The left one. It is not huge. Is anyone missing a shoe? Also, a can of SPAM. Logan swears it smells like weird bear. I think we have a YETI, guys. Like, an actual Bigfoot. If I find him, I'm naming him Harvey. DIBS.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You get that Harvey was the guy's INVISIBLE rabbit friend, right?

At least name it George. George was real.

Wait, was George the big one? Or was George what the big guy was gonna name Bugs?

It doesn't matter. Harvey the Sasquatch is awesome. Harvey the Yeti is also awesome. HARVEY IS AWESOME.

Aren't you Canadian? Don't all of you have one of those things already? Don't they grow them up there?

This is why he needs me.

I dunno, Cowpoke. There are so many Canadians here now. I don't know if you get automatic dibs on weird-ass Canadian wilderness beasts anymore? Shouldn't there be a rota? You had the moose, Kane got the fucked-up-magical-witch cat, shouldn't the Bigfoot go to Rogue or Logan?

I only pretend to be Canadian when it suits me.

Good to know I'm so good at it that you don't hear the Southern accent, eh?

...I thought you moved down south or something?

...weren't you part of Alpha Flight or whatever Canadian thing it was where Agent Lana met you?

No, ma'am. Born and raised in Mississippi.

Ask Wade how Southern I can be.

I just love Canada. Any country that has a cheese mafia and maple syrup heists is where I wanna belong to.

I'm Canadian on the inside where it counts

Huh. New info. That's gonna take some time to process.

Does that mean you root for their stupid baseball team?

Screw baseball.

Curling's where it's at!

SWEEEEEP

and you left me out of the fun?

I swear, pass out for one night because I finished finals....

I was running around the woods with a gun and a Logan chasing a big thing that smells like bear. Of course I left you out. I left everybody else out.

I'm not going to share my tacos with you

Pssh. I got my own tacos.

not anymore

THIEF.

revenge tastes like pico de gallo

I hope it tasted of ashes and despair.

delicious barbacoa.

sadly, I could not find queso and chips.

A potential monster of that caliber deserves a better name than Harvey.

Englebert. Bartholomew. Theodore.

All much better than Harvey.

There could be other names. But Harvey is the first one.

In order for there to be more than one, there has to be a Harvette.

Did ya think of that?

Why would you want to keep him?

...What would you even feed him?

Depends on if he's an herbivore or a carnivore or an omnivore!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only