xp_deadpool | (no subject)

(no subject)

So guys - I got these swords from this guy I know. They are awesome, all curved and shiny. I wanted a scimitar, but all he had was katanas and beggars can't be choosers, right? I bought two. Now I've just gotta figure out how to wield them without cutting anything important off myself. Don't worry, I only sliced my leg up like twice and there was hardly any blood. Seriously, this is gonna be epic.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Won't you grow it all back anyway if accidents happen?

He does but it leaves blood everywhere and scars and also it is unsanitary.

How is it unsanitary?

What my girlfriend said. Also, it takes a while and that's boring.

You and your weapons. You need a display wall, but I am not so very good at woodworking.

If you want one, my cousin does a bit of carpentry. And mechanics, and a few other sidelines.

I might take you up on that, good sir. Except I want to actually use these things, so putting them on the wall would be counterproductive.

Like four of my houses have display walls. And I have an apartment that's basically only display walls - for my battle axes, remember?

I wanna see that!

battle axes!

Top secret location, kid. Actually, it's not, it's just not in New York. Or the US.

you suck.

I think I have a passport.

But do you have a plane ticket?

this is why you suck!

...

Those are excited ellipses, right?

You know me better than to really think that.

But I'm optimistic!

Swords, Wade. Swords.

Awesome swords, doc. Awesome.

I'm siding with Wade here.

Sharp, shiny things are awesome! I've got bunches!

I can teach you.

And I've got a scimitar.

Just sayin'

You sure you don't just want the excuse to turn me into Wade-ribbons?

Nah, I know how to get you where it hurts if I wanted to do that. It's not with swords and I don't want to do it anyways. Your crazy is entertaining :)

We should do some kendo sometime. I've got several good practice shinai that we can use.

Because we are so not going with live blades, even if I do love my big honking greatsword. I don't grow back like you do.

I do love my big honking greatsword

You can go blind from that you know.

Dude, that's an urban legend, right along with growing hair on your palms.

Besides, a sword like mine takes a pretty fair amount of upkeep.

You know, don't you have like a girlfriend for that? I'm sure Laurie'd be happy to help you something something whetstone for a guy with a minor in English I am crappy at this.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only