xp_deadpool | (no subject)

(no subject)

So I got this fortune cookie tonight. It says, "A kind word will keep someone warm for years." Okay, fortune cookie. But I just keep thinking that setting them on fire will keep them warm for the rest of their lives!

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You wind up with bed sores if you stay warm in bed for years!

But you'd be moving around with all the sex you'd be having...

I have two words for you, McFrosty: refractory period.

I don't know what that means but are you sure your girlfriend wants you talking about her bodily functions on here?

Duuuuuuuuuude. Seriously, you and the Mountie need to have a talk about whose bodily functions are whose.

...

...are you saying men get periods?

Edited 2014-10-16 04:38 (UTC)

That sound you heard all the way over there at the mansion was my face hitting the desk here at the brownstone. For your edification (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Refractory_period_(sex)).

omg, I know! I was doing a shtick. I've been doing schticks all day.

...no one gets me.

Your face in that icon - seriously, was your drink that bad?

I was pretty drunk when Jean took that, and very upset about something, if I recall correctly. I just have a very expressive face.

Here, have one of me making a weird face. I don't even have the excuse of being drunk.

You're too far away from my laptop screen for me to see your icon properly and I have a stupid fucking cat sleeping on my chest so I can't move it closer. And yes, I know I need glasses but I refuse to get them.

Kick the cat out and see if the Mountie can put you in a better mood, McFrosty. I'm sure there's plenty of metaphorical cake to go around.

The cat will just come back. Even if I set it on fire it'll come back. And then I'll be on fire. And then I guess that means I can try your fortune cookie with Garrison?

I wouldn't suggest trying that fortune cookie with the Mountie except for maybe telling him he smells nice or something else that might be considered kind. Like his eyes sparkle with sunshine on a rainy day and make you feel all twitterpated. Cause y'know. The smell of burning hair would probably ruin his groove.

How do we know what would ruin his groove unless we try different things?

...and yes, that was another shtick.

Also, what the fuck is twitterpated?

Oh my God, how do you not know what twitterpated is? C'mon, you watched Bambi, didn't you? Are you on another schtick? Cause c'mon.

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x-adrienne.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 05:20 (UTC) - Expand

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x-deadpool.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 05:22 (UTC) - Expand

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x-adrienne.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 05:28 (UTC) - Expand

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x-deadpool.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 05:42 (UTC) - Expand

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x-adrienne.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 13:52 (UTC) - Expand

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x-cypher.livejournal.com - 2014-10-16 23:33 (UTC) - Expand

Adrienne, do you know that thing that Garrison does where he wants to have another... piece of cake just after the first piece of cake, and sometimes he wants a third or fourth cake, or at least can have three or four or five cakes in the same meal?

That is a short refractory period.

Cake! I have cake. Would you like to have a few slices of cake, ladybird?

Is this a regular sort of cake, a very good cake, or euphemistic metaphorical cake?

Why're you gonna make me choose? Can't we have both? We can have our cake and eat it too. For real and metaphorically.

If we are going to have cake and eat it too we should probably go out of the living room and kitchen table because I think Amanda would not like to find cake on the floor.

You're probably right.

Yeah. It's a powers thing.

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